Contribution to post:
Most of the time, people are either afraid or unwilling to engage kids with autism and families of kids with autism. The behavior of kids on the spectrum can range from quirky to frightening. Honestly, the best thing anyone can do is just ask questions. Talk to the parents and ask them what it's like. If their child is having a public meltdown, ask if there's anything they can do. Just having that little engagement means a lot. Most of the time, people just avoid engagement when they see a kid on the spectrum. It's isolating and families with these kids feel isolated too. I get why people feel uncomfortable. I understand not wanting to get involved in something weird and unnerving. I felt the same way before I had a son with autism. "Why is that kid acting like that? Why does he keep doing those same motions? Can the parents do anything about their kid?" There's no cure, there's a lot of challenges and there's a lot of misperception.
The people I remember as the most helpful are people who just talk to me and my family about the subject. Just a simple "What's it like?" is such a joy to hear. I know this person isn't taking the easy out of just avoiding me and my family. I don't need anybody to fix anything for me and my family. We love our son the way he is, challenges and all. He's unique. His mind is wonderfully different in how he experiences the world. Communication is difficult for many people with autism. It's hard to engage with them. But they desperately need to be engaged. They need someone willing to talk to them, to learn about them, to say they'll try to understand and be present for them. Same goes for the families. It might be hard or feel awkward for people to ask questions about our son. But I love it when they do. I love that someone is willing to talk to me, to try and understand something unfamiliar, to take my son and my family out of the isolation we frequently feel. "What's it like?" goes a long way.
I love that my kid is different. To be honest, I don't always feel this way and I was absolutely terrified when we got the diagnosis. But I've learned. It's really great to see how George is distinctive and how he reacts to the world around him. A good friend of mine with a child on the spectrum said that she loves the fact that her kid will always be a little weird. I agree with her. Embrace the weird.
Here's a link to an article I wish I'd read many years ago when George was first diagnosed. "Advice for Parents of Children just diagnosed with Autism from Those Who've Been there."